The Butt Ugly Weblog

--Hugo, 27-May-2008

Bzzzt. Thanks for playing, you are too young ;-)

--JanneJalkanen, 28-May-2008

For instance, "William Shatner owns six pairs of green socks." isn't a good troll if he owns seven pairs.

"Isn't William Shatner a pair of green socks?" is a good troll, but ONLY if it works, and generates one of the four desired responses:

LEVEL 1 TROLLAGE (GULLIBOZO, 100 points): "He is? Oh no! Now I'd better tell everyone else I know who used to like him!!!" Believes everything he or she reads in actual print, which includes Usenet.

LEVEL 2 TROLLAGE (CYCLOPEDANT, 10 points): "No he isn't. I know because he was on Star Trek last night and spent six hours enlarging every frame on my computer to look for green socks and you're wrong, you must be stupid or something!" Lacks a bullshit detector.

LEVEL 3 TROLLAGE (IMPEDANT, 3.14159 points): "I know this must be an attempt to troll me, but I'll answer it anyway: No, he isn't. He is a human being." Bullshit detector malfunctioning, allowing pedantal lobe to override.

LEVEL 4 TROLLAGE (OTHER, 1/2 point): "I don't know." Doesn't know but seems too interested for own good.

The desired response to an attempt at trolling is *not* a flame. Flame-bait is not trolling, and trolling is not flame-bait, although it sometimes generates flames from those whose bullshit detector is connected directly to the bullshit generator. Flames generated by attempts to troll people do not affect your score.

I should mention also the concept of a META-TROLL, which consists of posting a COMPLETELY ACCURATE, TRUE, SANE statement and having trollage ensue.

(true statement) "Nichelle Nichols on 'Star Trek' was dating the producer, Gene Roddenberry!" (level 2 response) "No, that was Majel Barrett!" (explanation, not promulgated) Gene Roddenberry really was dating Nichelle "Lt. Uhura" Nichols *and* Majel "Nurse Chapel" Barrett at the same time.

Meta-trolls generate BONUS POINTS, doubling your score.

There's also the COUNTER-TROLL, which is the concept of parrying a troll with another troll, often done by people whose bullshit detector is connected to the trollerizer:

(obvious troll) "Major Barrett wrote every episode of 'Star Trek' with his wife, Jean Roddenberry." (troll detected and parried) "Actually, you're thinking of 'Deep Babylon Nine', starring George Lucas's pet rabbit Binky."

If the counter-troll generates trollage, the counter-troller receives double points, and they are deducted from YOUR score, you LOSER!

The first person on the Internet to receive 10,000,000 points will be declared the winner and will receive "hitsies".

Also you must take a drink whenever someone mentions Star Trek, ever.

-- K. I invented trolling the year after I invented the smilie. Also I didn't say if he _gets_ hitsies or _GETS_ hitsies.

--Tai, 28-May-2008

Funny, yes, though I've never encountered Kibo myself... I think I'm a bit too young, and I didn't frequent the right places at the time.

--Pare, 28-May-2008

Tai, ROFL! That would be the correct answer :-D

--JanneJalkanen, 29-May-2008

Pare: I've actually been Kibo'd! Of course, back then I had no idea what that was all about - otherwise I would've saved that.

--JanneJalkanen, 29-May-2008